20 May, 2025

I don't judge. My dad never went to therapy and I was in my forties before I started. But this is a problem. Many men suffer needlessly, lose relationships, and take longer to get their lives back in order after a difficult patch. And that is before looking at the emotional costs paid by those people around them.

5 Reasons for not going to therapy

• "There is nothing wrong with me!". Most men will ignore all signs of trouble and wait till a crisis develops before looking for help.
• "It's a girl thing!". Therapy is seen as a feminine activity and most therapists and clients are female. Men are socially conditioned to repress any emotions that will make them appear less masculine. They may feel fear and shame at the idea of not being in control of their lives.
• "I'm ok. I've got weed and alcohol". Drugs are a short-term solution at best, and alcohol abuse increases the risk of depression and suicide.
• "What if my friends or employer find out?". It is confidential.
• "I can't afford it". Private therapy is not cheap, but low-cost options exist in most cities and its free in the NHS.

Seeing a good therapist will help you be more grounded, successful, and emotionally and physically wealthy. I can't know how my life would have been different if my dad had gone to therapy, or if I had had therapy as a teenager. But I do know that it is never too late to start.

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